Start Or Sit (On Your Face): The DFO Fantasy/Sex Mailbag

The Maestro - January 8, 2016January 8, 2016

With Fantasy Football now finished for the season (boooo), the Mailbag is now transitioning to that of a grab bag - your sex lives can still get plenty of attention, but anything goes for questions now! Sports! Violence! Inventions! Whatever ya got, it's all on the table here. So welcome back!

Dear NFL Network,

ballsofsteelandfury - December 23, 2015December 22, 2015

Seeing as you are televising this week's Thursday Night Football game featuring the hapless San Diego Chargers against the resurgent and will be a force to contend with next year Oakland Raiders, I would like to make a simple humble request: CAN YOU PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF WHATEVER DEITY OR

Donald Trump Gets A Friendly Call

makeitsnowondem - December 18, 2015December 18, 2015

A phone rings in a spacious, luxurious apartment in Trump Tower. A large, dead caterpillar perched atop a molding orange answers.                                                                                

Owners To New Players: KEEP OUT

SonOfSpam - November 17, 2015November 17, 2015

Responding to fallout from pictures of injuries inflicted by Greg Hardy on his girlfriend, several NFL team owners are calling for a halt to drafting new players into the league. "Every time a player screws up, it's someone who played in college," said Cowboys' owner Jerry Jones. "We think it's

Star of “The League” Admits Lies About 9/11 Escape, Declared Not Funny Retroactively

trollsoharduniversity - September 16, 2015September 16, 2015

After a New York Times investigation revealed that his story about fleeing the World Trade Center on 9/11 was not true, Steve Rannazzisi was declared not funny by various television personalities and internet commenters. Mr. Rannazzisi, best known for his portrayal of Kevin McArthur on the hit FX Sitcom The League, appeared on Marc

2015 NFL Season Review and Power Rankings

New School Zero - September 10, 2015August 31, 2015

Oh, you poor bastards. Today we careen over the precipice and into an existence devoid of mercy and gentleness, a series of darkening days and nights without dawn. The barrel of the 2015 National Football League season now rests against the back of your head, the danger of it having

Mr. Trump Goes To San Diego

SonOfSpam - August 25, 2015August 24, 2015

People of San Diego, I have traveled here today to make a HYOOOGE announcement that will affect your San Diego Chargers, as well as the entire NFL, and of course, the world. As you know, in about a year or whenever, I will be President of The United States. Of

Duchess’ Arbitrary Debate Awards

Duchess - August 6, 2015August 7, 2015

If you made it through the debate without, as 5Chan would say, "An heroing". Congrats! Now for some made up rewards. Best Impression of the Factory of Sadness Three-way tie - Jeb Bush was flat, Rand Paul lacks the weird charisma his father has, and Chris Christie... can a New York/New Jersey politician run on