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Tag: quickie
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NFL Fan Drunkenness News OR How Do We Stop Worrying and Get Sponsored By a Breathalyzer?
Apparently BACtrack (sidenote: AWESOME name for a company) has been collecting blood alcohol content data on NFL gamedays and analyzing which fans are drunkest.…
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A fearless and moral inventory
(As the sun comes up, a gathering of lost souls is happening in Nearby Church Basement, Anywhere, USA) Todd: I’d like to thank everyone for…
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Saturday Evening Puzzle
I was thinking about doing a visual type of puzzle for a while now and I’m finally giving it a shot. Even if you…
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Coping With Loss in La Jolla
(somewhere on a sunny beach in La Jolla, Callifornia) Brad: Brah! Good waves out there today. Jackson: Totally, brah. And my gal K8 [ed. note–literally spelled that…
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Somewhere outside of Jersey City…
Corn Maze Employee #1: I’m telling you, man, he was in there all night. Corn Maze Employee #2: Doing what, though? #1: Hell if…
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Elaina Watley Sends a Group Text
Elaina Watley: That cheating bastard! I’ll show him! [Phone Flies Open] Morris Claiborne: Oh, ha ha ha! Very fucking funny!
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Chicago Firesale?
Earlier today, the Chicago Bears traded DE/LB/Mullet Enthusiast Jared Allen to the Carolina Panthers. Had to be a good deal, right? According to the…
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French Jay Cutler Goes On Strike!
/long pull on a skinny and extremely noxious cigarette Bon jour, sports fans of questionable culture. I av called you here today to say, c’est…
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Trent Green Encounters a Mirror
[Trent Green is singing and dancing alone in his room] Trent: [Singing] Da-nana, naaaa nanana… HEY! Dana-nana… Trent: Oh, hi there handsome. Say, I…
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Quick hitter: Mailbag ideas
So we started on the mailbag stream of consciousness a little earlier. I’m totally fucking game. If we get the questions, I’m here with…