Headlong Into the Void! Saturday Open Thread

King Hippo - March 5, 2022March 4, 2022

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Is the world still seven kinds of fucked? YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT. Good think there's Lesser Footy. Everton overcame the runaway freight train that is Boreham Wood, so the Toffees are in the FA Cup Flacco Eight, and one win away from Wembley. Strange days. But for the Prem, we kick

Six Days Dry as the Sahara – Lesser Footy Open Thread

King Hippo - February 19, 2022February 18, 2022

No, for the love of Christ, I am not off the pills. WHY THE MONKEYFUCK WOULD ANYONE DO THAT?? But man, FITBAW heroine withdrawal is bad enough. Thank fuck for Frank Lampard, amirite?? If you wake up for Hammers/Barcodes, and you aren't Fronk, you get what you deserve - it's behind

The Day Before The Owl 2022 Open Thread

King Hippo - February 12, 2022February 11, 2022

So much excite! Two squadrons that I don't have even a tiny bit of hatred for, playing for the Owl title. What are we to do in the lead-up? WATCH LESSER FOOTY, of course! Because of the 2022 Sticky Icky Stoner Games Winter Olympics, or just out of rampant greed -

The One Where Hippo Starts Watching Everton Again

King Hippo - January 22, 2022January 22, 2022

Admittedly, the rumours around the managerial search...have not been encouraging. There remains chaos and incompetence in the boardroom. But fuck it, Useless Fuckwit Benitez is gone, and I can watch my beloved Toffees again. Which is timely, given that Everton/Villa are the wakey-bakey Saturday offering (7:30, USA). Slippy G returns to

Lesser USA (Starting) Today

King Hippo - January 1, 2022December 31, 2021

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Rest in peace, NBCSN. Woe be to USA's loyal Law and Order re-run devotees, the Premier League is coming to rule Saturday morning. Don't worry, Rebecc-ur and the Robbies will still run things. And they won the bid for the next 7 or so years, so things should be stable for

Holiday Weekend Becomes Regular Weekend Lesser Footy and JV Stuff

King Hippo - November 27, 2021November 26, 2021

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Anyone else come to the title's realization, and get pre-depressed? Just me, then. And Everton hasn't even lost (again) yet. We start early with Gooners and Barcodes (7:30, NBCSN). One hopes Handsome Mikel takes out some frustrations in this one, as the visitors cosplay as murderous shieks. FUN TIMES! You're going to

Welcome Back, Beloved Prem

King Hippo - November 20, 2021November 18, 2021

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Sorry Coach Reid - I know you read that as Beloved Parm. Today will be interesting, as I leave my recluse lair around halftime of my Wolves du Merde (Derby with Scotchy's l'Orange) fixture (that's at 4:00 on ACCN, it deserves no preview). I am off to see oldest HippoSpawn do

Time To Get Away – 6 November 2021 Lesser Goodness

King Hippo - November 6, 2021November 5, 2021

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Look, I have given up on human society. It just gets worse by the day. Retreat into the only consistently (well, mostly consistent) good thing in life, sportsball! I also heard the best cover ever on the radio this week, just edging out my previous shempion ("Mrs. Robinson" by The

Set It On Fire! Saturday

King Hippo - October 23, 2021October 22, 2021

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As you go about your daily activities, don't you get the feeling that your city, state/province, and/or neighboUrhood could use a pretty little fire? Especially a pretty little fire that grows into an impressive, towering, gorgeoUs inferno?? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQUFBkYmc6U OK, maybe y'all Californians ought not try this. But we can all enjoy Lesser Footy! Is

Welcome Back Full Footy Days

King Hippo - October 16, 2021October 16, 2021

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Ain't it grand? International bullshit is over (but NOT MANDATORY London NFL WOO!!!!), and there is no reason to leave your couch/recliner except to piss and/or re-caffeinate. Let us begin. Are you waking/baking early to watch the goddamned fuckass Redshite beat up on our poor Moose Hornets (7:30, Peacock)? Don't be that

Ringing in October 2021 (In Lesser FashioUn)

King Hippo - October 2, 2021October 1, 2021

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Good morning, everyone. Are y'all enjoying the (very occasional) chill in the air? Ah sure is. Sadly, we have another dumb international break on tap, so savoUr the full slate while y'all can. The morning starts early (7:30, NBCSN), with uber-short handed Everton headed to Old Trafford to have their shit

So Much Lesser, So Little Time

King Hippo - September 25, 2021September 24, 2021

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Is everybody enjoying the slow transition to Fall weather? I know I sure am. Heat and being a fat fuck don't go together too well. But sitting around watching glorious footy? That's a bingo. How weird is this? Both Manchester teams in the "up with the roosters slot." The marquee being