Can't fool you guys, you're too smart. Yep, it's Independence Day weekend. Uncle Sam might not officially turn 241 until Tuesday, but we're celebrating the whole damned weekend. So find your beverage of choice, grab your flag (I said FLAG!!!!!!)....and let's do this. Sexy, Patriotic, Red, White and Blue Girls is the
Month: June 2017
Request Line: GIVE DEREK ALL THE MONEY
INT. RECORDING STUDIO – DAY A young man sits inside a recording booth, looking relaxed and happy. The PRODUCER is outside the booth, punching buttons and counting off with his fingers. For once, everything seems to be running quite smoothly. PRODUCER: Good afternoon, and welcome to Request Line! We are beyond
Anti-Millenial Gloating Achieves Apex
The over-29 Internet contingent is claiming a resounding victory for truth. "See, SEE; I told ya" was the general outcry of every person with a cellphone that recalls having used a payphone out of necessity. "I'm sure those You Tube kids were constantly praised by their parents. Could've used a
Hard Ride To Nowhere (Chapter 85)
The scene: The Pacific Ocean, where BFC and Jerry are clinging to a floating bale of weed and paddling towards a distant island. Jerry: I mean... You said you wanted to get some swimming in on this trip. BFC (glaring): Remember that time in Naples? Jerry: Yeah...? BFC: When you slept with that gymnast? Jerry:
Your “The Offseason Is Over–OVER I TELLS YA!” Open Thread
Well, it’s been a long wait, and it was rough. Was. For the naysayers: June ends tomorrow and training camps start in July. The science is unimpeachable. No more speculations based on drills in shorts—it’s over! Oh man, you can almost smell the Toradol. The wait gets worse every year, as all offseason
CFL Beat: Week 2
Your “You Don’t Have Beerguy To Kick Around For A While” Wednesday Evening Open Thread
MIDWEEK RATIONS EP: XI – TAIN’T THE SEASON
What is it about me and taints? I blame Balls and his post concerning analingus (according to Word's spell-check, I'm misspelling inguinal). I suppose it's a pretty important sector of anatomical real estate; I spend enough time keeping the old scrote (now I'm misspelling scooter) springtime fresh, so a little
The Unbearable Litness of Being Josh Gordon
Your “Ugh – This Crap Again?!” Tuesday Evening Open Thread
Inside the Bear Den
SCENE: Two large(ish) men speak in hushed tones as the walk the rough and tumble streets of Lake Forest, Illinois. They appear prepared for a long journey, massive backpacks hugging their muscular bodies. Both carry flashlights despite the sun beaming down from its peak height. And on their hips are
