Welcome back! Last night, the NFL decided we had had enough close quality games and decided to force feed the nation the not-at-all anticipated matchup of the Patriots vs the Giants. True, the Giants have beaten the Patriots in two Super Bowls, but this wasn't a Super
Assholes
Balls on ASSignment: Thursday Night Football Review Week Five
Go Home, Fate, You’re Drunk: 2019 Detroit Lions at the Bye
[INTERIOR, STAGE WITH CLOSED CURTAIN. From offstage, muffled and slurred shouts are heard, mostly inaudible but include variations on "Not goin' outthere!" and "You an whose army, cock-knocker?"] [Eventually, REVEREND MAYHEM is shoved through the curtain and stumbles into frame, one hand clutching a bottle of brown liquid labeled "JJ Fozz
The Miami Dolphins at the Bye
Hello everyone! Welcome to the Dolphins at the bye—also known as the one week where Miami can’t lose on the field. I’m your host, Wakezilla. Since this diarrhea-inside-a-dumpster-fire-outside-of-an-abortion-clinic season is going according to plan, there isn’t much to talk about, except for two positive stories: Raekown McMillan has turned into an
Balls on ASSignment: Thursday Night Football Review Week Four
Huh…..: Your San Francisco 49ers Bye Week Update
DO YOU BELIEVE IN MIRACLES!??!?!? YES!!!! Friends, I have preached before at interminable length about how we live in The New Time of Wonders. Now BLEERGH!, Shan'khlor and the other Elderly Gods have seen fit to show us another Sign and Portent. Yes, it is Week 4, and Jimmy Garoppolo's bones and tendons
Way Too Many Words on the Jets at the Bye: A Jets at the Bye Post
CrimeBeat!: Blind Squirrel Edition
What a long, strange trip it's been for Antonio Brown in New England. They've laughed. They've cried. They've grumbled. Yes, Antonio Brown's lengthy tenure with Patriots has come to an abrupt and in-no-way-foreseeable end. Massholes, Junior Massholes from New Hampshire/Maine/Rhode Island and various band-wagoners will look back fondly on all the